Filthy lucre

Have you ever received dirty money? Not the kind that is obtained through smuggling terrorists across customs or selling crack in the schoolyard, but the really filthy nasty kind that looks as if a street person had used it as a handkerchief? I was at a small taco shop late last week for lunch when I was handed two tattered, slightly moist singles as part of my change. This money was some of the most filthy paper I've ever encountered, and has actually imparted a rotten sort of odor to my wallet over the course of this weekend. Ironically enough, the two fish tacos which I ate for lunch that day rendered no ill effects on my stomach later that evening. Luck of the draw, I guess.

One alternative would be to actually spend the damn things, but that's just the easy way out - as any economics major will tell you, due to fractional reserve banking, the dirty cash actually multiplies like a virus through the system, spawing multiple offspring for each one reintroduced into the money supply. Well today, I've decided that I shall launder my currency with the next load. I am trying to decide whether I should dump it in with my whites, which would achieve the benefit of a touch of Chlorox, or stuff it into the pocket of my jeans which would send it in with the colors on the warm/cool cycle.

Any suggestions would be appreciated.